So today I want to talk about how hard it can be for spoonies to do some of the most basic things that others, and us before diagnoses, take for granted!
Tomorrow I will be sharing a letter I wrote to my local newspaper in hopes it would be published as a letter to the editor. No idea if it will be yet but I want to share the experience with you guys.
Today my pain is a 7
- Taking a shower! Most people find showers one of the most relaxing things. And some people find it easy to shower multiple times a day just to feel clean. The shower is supposed to be where you can just stand other the warm water and really think about life and where you can sing loudly and actually think you sound good enough to get a record deal. All in all, a shower should be something easy, get in, soap up, rinse and contemplate your life. But for spoonies taking a shower is extremely hard, which is why I invest so much money in dry shampoo. For me it’s extremely hard to stand for more than 10 minutes when I am not doing anything else. So standing while having to move my hands and hold my arms up long enough to successfully wash my hair. Chronic Pain is having to lay on my bed trying to breath and relax my body for 15 minutes after a shower.
- Working! Believe me I was one of those people who use to dread Monday morning, every Sunday night I would be one of those people “ugh I don’t want to go to work tomorrow”. But now all I want is to be able to work full time. People would say I had it easy when I use to work full time. I had a nice sit-down office job where I did paperwork to license new cars people bought, they would tell me I had nothing to complain about and that I sit all day so I couldn’t possibly be in that much pain when I didn’t have to move around. The thing is sometimes I hurt even more sitting. Where my disease is I cannot sit or stand too long, I have to constantly keep find a new comfortable position to be in, which is hard when you have to be sitting straight up at a desk all day. Plus, it is near impossible to take pain medication at work without someone either noticing you talking it or mentioning how you seem to be acting different. It is also very hard and irresponsible to focus on legal paperwork when you are high on medication. Chronic pain is making the tough choice everyday if you should call in sick or work drugged up.
- Wearing Skinny Jeans! As a lady with endometriosis I have given up trying to wear skinny jeans. When you have endo, you get what we call “endo belly”, it’s when my endo flares up and my belly bloats to the point where I look pregnant. This bloating can even make my need pants 3-4 sizes bigger than I would normally wear. The worst part of endo belly is you never know when it is coming, I have gone from a size 5 to a size 8 within an hour before. So, I really don’t ever wear pants unless they have a stretchy waist band that can accommodate extra sizes. Chronic Pain is throwing out all the jeans in your closet.
- The Holidays! Any holiday is supposed to be a happy time you enjoy with family, Christmas even more so. It is supposed to be a joyous time full of family and food and fun. Well we all know Christmas is already a stressful time; you have to spend money on gifts for everyone and their cousin, you have to wear nice clothes and get all dolled up and you have to be really careful with what you eat. I know the food is the hardest thing for me, having endo means I have to really be careful not to eat something that will trigger a flare up and it is extremely hard for me to do that when there are so many goodies being handed to me. You don’t know how many times I have just said “screw it, it’s Christmas I can cheat for one night”.. ya no.. I also end up crying myself to sleep in pain that night. Chronic Pain means spending the holidays in constant fear of triggering a flare up.
Tomorrow I will be sharing a letter I wrote to my local newspaper in hopes it would be published as a letter to the editor. No idea if it will be yet but I want to share the experience with you guys.
Today my pain is a 7